In some relationships, being demanding is (arguably) required to achieve the highest performance—for a coach with an athlete, for a leader with a team, or for a customer with a supplier. A little discomfort may be needed for the greatest achievement. Deliver the leadership people need rather than the leadership they want, they say.
On the other hand, self-generated, intrinsic motivation may be the most sustainable long-term driver of performance.
Being too demanding may risk being counter-productive (as well as uncomfortable) resulting in a lower performance, beyond the peak, as stress, distraction and tension set in.
What’s your experience? How demanding should a coach or a leader or a customer be? How do you tell when you’re overdoing it or when you’re not being demanding enough?