Some participants make sure their contributions to the meeting add something to the main thread of the dialogue. You can tell they are mindful of the main direction of the subject at hand, and see it as bigger than any of them individually. They know how to nurture the theme. (You can often tell who they are: They are the ones who usually listen more than they speak.)
On the other hand…
Others want to push their point; to press for a particular approach, even if it distracts and saps energy from the shared process. They seem unaware there is a flow of shared meaning that deserves respect—something separate from any of the individuals present. It’s as if they see only an exchange of statements and questions between people, rather than the development of something additive and greater than the sum of the parts. Because they don’t see anything separate, they can’t begin to nurture the developing picture.
Sure, some gatherings may suit a robust approach, but when it comes to developing something together…
Do you respect the common thread?
In fact…
Are you a theme player?