It’s good to be accommodating. It helps make a reality of collaboration and getting a group of people working together.
We need to be demanding.
Some roles involve directing an organisation on behalf of stakeholders of one kind and another. At times, that means asking clearly for what we want. That’s both the nature of the job, and the culture expected of the people involved—a shared value, if you like.
Different sectors have different expectations about the balance between being demanding and being accommodating.
Where’s the right point for you—soft or hard, or somewhere in between?
Good to be clear about this, perhaps even to flex a little, depending on the circumstances—on which tribe you’re with at the time. Or don’t expect to fit everywhere. That’s fine too.